Tenacity of just plain stupidity?

I'm unclear at this point. I know that to "aire is human", but I "aire" all the freakin time. 

But does this just make me human, or a failure? 

I know that getting back up after failing is good. Better than just giving up I know but WHY can't I stop in the middle of what I'm doing and get back on track? Why must I throw in the towel and keep shoving crap in my mouth. 

Dear Lord Help me! 

I'm to the point that I don't give a crap what people think about me in this area. I may post and no one may answer but dangit at least I"m posting. It has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that I can't do it, because no matter the reason I'm gonna get there. 

Where ever the heck "there" is.